Every two weeks my partner and I have couples counseling. I am a strongly advocate couples counseling for relationships with one or two combat veterans. However… listen closely… don’t judge me but … I hate it!
Therapy by yourself is awesome. You sit there. You bad mouth who you want. You cry while only your therapist sees you. You talk about those horrible things that you want no one to know about but you.
Therapy with another person is completely different. It’s almost like having a major ego trip. You have to sit there in front of your partner, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife and be told you were wrong. In counseling by yourself the counselor is going to say you are wrong, but you are alone. He doesn’t have to hear it. You can go on about your day without your significant other knowing. My personal issue is the rawness of it.
I hate telling people my problems. I just recently got comfortable talking to my personal therapist. Now I have to talk about these horrible embarrassing things that happened in front of our therapist and my partner. You just leave with that feeling you had of when your parents told you were grounded. I am not saying our family therapist chastises us (she is one of the better providers are the Debakey VA). It’s the idea that you are to old for this crap.
Yesterday, my partner called at around 11am and asked, ” We have couples counselling at 1500. Do you want to go?” I groaned,”Not really but I will.”
I am not quiter. This relationship isn’t easy but is any relationship easy? So there are times I am going to do things I don’t want to. There are times I am going to have to make sacrifices. Like watch tv shows I don’t like. Listen to terrible music. Go to my couples therapy every two weeks.